30 September 2011

What is not shared....



"The truth is you already know what it's like. You already know the difference between the size and speed of everything that flashes through you and the tiny inadequate bit of it all you can ever let anyone know. As though inside you is this enormous room full of what seems like everything in the whole universe at one time or another and yet the only parts that get out have to somehow squeeze out through one of those tiny keyholes you see under the knob in older doors. As if we are all trying to see each other through these tiny keyholes.

But it does have a knob, the door can open. But not in the way you think. The truth is you've already heard this. That this is what it's like. That it's what makes room for the universes inside you, all the endless inbent fractals of connection and symphonies of different voices, the infinities you can never show another soul. And you think it makes you a fraud, the tiny fraction anyone else ever sees? Of course you're a fraud, of course what people see is never you. And of course you know this, and of course you try to manage what part they see if you know it's only a part. Who wouldn't? It's called free will, Sherlock. But at the same time it's why it feels so good to break down and cry in front of others, or to laugh, or speak in tongues, or chant in Bengali - it's not English anymore, it's not getting squeezed through any hole.

So cry all you want, I won't tell anybody."
- David Foster Wallace
Oblivion

29 September 2011

New Blog I like and will follow: The Last Psychiatrist

Louis CK on being a Dad

I really loved watching this video that was embedded in a blog I recently began to read. On its own there are valuable insights or more accurately, insights that confirm some of my own observations. Reading the blog after watching the video illuminated my superficial take. More importantly, it drove home the conundrum parenthood presents: having to sacrifice the impulse of the self to cater to the needs of the child.

It is much easier to be two kinds of people at two different times than it is to be two kinds of people at the same time.

--The Last Psychiatrist

I look forward to following the posts of this blogger. They provide very useful well thought through insights my lazy superficial mind so desperately needs.

23 September 2011

Only with Love


from: Predatory Wasp Observer


If a psychological problem were set to find means of making men of our time - Christian, humane, simple, kind people - perform the most horrible crimes without feeling guilty, only one solution could be devised: simply to go on doing what is being done now. It is only necessary that these people should be governors, inspectors, policemen; that they should be fully convinced that there is a kind of business, called Government service, which allows men to treat other men as things without having human brotherly relations with them; and that they should be so linked together by this Government service that the responsibility for the results of their deeds should not fall on anyone of them individually. Without these conditions the terrible acts I witnessed today would be impossible in our times.

It all lies in the fact that men think there are circumstances when one may deal with human beings without love. But there are no such circumstances. We may deal with things without love - we cut down trees, make bricks, hammer iron without love - but we cannot deal with men without it, just as one cannot deal with bees without being careful. If one deals carelessly with bees one will injure them and will one’s self be injured. And so with men. It cannot be otherwise, because mutual love is the fundamental law of human life.

It is true that a man cannot force another to love him as he can force him to work for him, but it does not follow that one may deal with men without love, especially if one demands or expects anything from them. If you feel no love, sit still,” Nekhyudov thought; “occupy yourself with things, with yourself, with anything you like, only not with men. Just as you can only eat without injuring yourself when you are hungry, so you can only usefully and without injury deal with men when you love. Only let yourself deal with a man without love, as I did yesterday with my brother-in-law, and there are no limits to the suffering you will bring on yourself, as all my life proves.

- Leo Tolstoy in Resurrection (1899)

21 September 2011

Sound Advice from another Century


Betrand Russell's Advice to Our Descendants

In this world which is getting more and more closely interconnected we have to learn to tolerate each other. We have to learn to put up with the fact that some people say things that we don't like.


I think we ought always to entertain our opinions with some measure of doubt. I shouldn't wish people dogmatically to believe any philosophy, not even mine.


14 September 2011

The Silence



The Saviors of God - Spiritual Exercises

by Nikos Kazantzakis

THE SILENCE

  1. THE SOUL OF MAN IS a flame, a bird of fire that leaps from bough to bough, from head to head, and that shouts: "I cannot stand still, I cannot be consumed, no one can quench me"

13 September 2011

Bad Days

reblogged from: Crashingly Beautiful

This is about all the bad days in the world. I used to have some little bad days, and I kept them in a little box. And one day, I threw them out into the yard. “Oh, it’s just a couple little innocent bad days.” Well, we had a big rain. I don’t know what it was growing in but I think we used to put eggshells out there and coffee grounds, too. Don’t plant your bad days. They grow into weeks. The weeks grow into months. Before you know it you got yourself a bad year. Take it from me. Choke those little bad days. Choke ‘em down to nothin’. They’re your days. Choke ‘em!

11 September 2011

Counsels and Maxims, by Arthur Schopenhauer Chapter IV, Worldly Fortune.


SECTION 52. What people commonly call Fate is, as a general rule, nothing but their own stupid and foolish conduct. There is a fine passage in Homer,54 illustrating the truth of this remark, where the poet praises [GREEK: maetis]— shrewd council; and his advice is worthy of all attention. For if wickedness is atoned for only in another world, stupidity gets its reward here — although, now and then, mercy may be shown to the offender.

54 Iliad , xxiii. 313, sqq.]

It is not ferocity but cunning that strikes fear into the heart and forebodes danger; so true it is that the human brain is a more terrible weapon than the lion’s paw.

The most finished man of the world would be one who was never irresolute and never in a hurry.

09 September 2011

Counsels and Maxims, by Arthur Schopenhauer



Chapter III.

Our Relation to Others.

— Section 21.

In making his way through life, a man will find it useful to be ready and able to do two things: to look ahead and to overlook: the one will protect him from loss and injury, the other from disputes and squabbles.

No one who has to live amongst men should absolutely discard any person who has his due place in the order of nature, even though he is very wicked or contemptible or ridiculous. He must accept him as an unalterable fact — unalterable, because the necessary outcome of an eternal, fundamental principle; and in bad cases he should remember the words of Mephistopheles: es muss auch solche Käuze geben34 — there must be fools and rogues in the world. If he acts otherwise, he will be committing an injustice, and giving a challenge of life and death to the man he discards. No one can alter his own peculiar individuality, his moral character, his intellectual capacity, his temperament or physique; and if we go so far as to condemn a man from every point of view, there will be nothing left him but to engage us in deadly conflict; for we are practically allowing him the right to exist only on condition that he becomes another man — which is impossible; his nature forbids it.

34 Goethe’s Faust , Part I.]

So if you have to live amongst men, you must allow everyone the right to exist in accordance with the character he has, whatever it turns out to be: and all you should strive to do is to make use of this character in such a way as its kind and nature permit, rather than to hope for any alteration in it, or to condemn it off-hand for what it is. This is the true sense of the maxim — Live and let live. That, however, is a task which is difficult in proportion as it is right; and he is a happy man who can once for all avoid having to do with a great many of his fellow creatures.

The art of putting up with people may be learned by practicing patience on inanimate objects, which, in virtue of some mechanical or general physical necessity, oppose a stubborn resistance to our freedom of action — a form of patience which is required every day. The patience thus gained may be applied to our dealings with men, by accustoming ourselves to regard their opposition, wherever we encounter it, as the inevitable outcome of their nature, which sets itself up against us in virtue of the same rigid law of necessity as governs the resistance of inanimate objects. To become indignant at their conduct is as foolish as to be angry with a stone because it rolls into your path. And with many people the wisest thing you can do, is to resolve to make use of those whom you cannot alter.

Counsels and Maxims by Arthur Schopenhauer




SECTION 29. It is often the case that people of noble character and great mental gifts betray a strange lack of worldly wisdom and a deficiency in the knowledge of men, more especially when they are young; with the result that it is easy to deceive or mislead them; and that, on the other hand, natures of the commoner sort are more ready and successful in making their way in the world.

--Counsels and Maxims, by Arthur Schopenhauer

06 September 2011

EL EMPLEO / THE EMPLOYMENT - OPUSBOU - YouTube

Pertinent to Labor Day and its aftermath. A video by the Argentine illustrators Santiago Grasso and Patricio Gabriel Plaza. To compliment the emotional residue of our situation, the sermon delivered by British writer Jeanette Winterson entitled The Temptation of Jesus.

We have time to get it right. That is the purpose of Time, isn't it?



EL EMPLEO / THE EMPLOYMENT - OPUSBOU - YouTube

The Temptation of Jesus
The Manchester Sermon 2010
The Temptation of Jesus
Jeanette Winterson

Jeanette at Manchester Cathedral

If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made into bread. Matthew 4:3

Do you remember the story of Midas? He’s the one who loved gold so much that he wished that everything he touched could turn to gold.

At first it was fantastic – that old garden chair, those tin plates, that worthless heap of boxes, his bed, his bath, his pots and pans – he had golden clothes and golden hair – he looked like Paris Hilton.

Midas went on-line and bought a castle in Vegas – it wasn’t real gold, but he could fix that up himself. Then he sat down and had a servant pour him a celebratory glass of Krug n Soda in his golden goblet – he raised it to his lips but instead of Krug by the glug, he got a solid slug of gold. So he sat like a baby while the servants fed and watered him.

Midas bent down to stroke his hunting dog, but suddenly he had a life-size golden Jeff Koons on his hands.

He swung up onto his horse, and in the second of touch and rear, his mount became a triumphal monument, glittering and priceless, but useless if what you wanted to do was to ride into the hills.

Soon he couldn’t touch a thing – he became the world’s most expensive leper. No-one wanted to go near Midas. He lived in the isolation ward of his own desire.

Then one day his little girl, who had been away, came running back into the palace, delighting at the golden flowers and golden birds and sliding across the golden pond – she thought it was a game just for her.

Papa, Papa, she shouted, jumping into his arms, and there she was, lifeless, perfect.
Truly, his golden girl.

It was time for Midas to re-think a few values.

Like many of us I hoped that the current economic crisis, so severe and without excuse, would be a global and generational opportunity to re-think our values.

Amassing wealth has always been a driving factor in the human psyche – nothing new about that as the Midas story shows. What is new – only about 250 years old, industrial revolution onwards – is the scale of the endeavour. Stones into bread… base metal into gold, we have managed in a very short time to turn all of the planet and all of its peoples into one vast money-making machine.

And it started here in Manchester – Cottonopolis as it was called – because from 1840 to 1914 60% of the world’s cotton came here to be processed.

Imagine it – the vast steamed-powered gas-lit factories and the back-to back tenements thrown up in between. The filth, the smoke, the stink of dye and ammonia, sulphur and coal. The cash, the ceaseless activity day and night, the deafening noise of looms, of trains, of trams, of wagons on cobbles, of teeming relentless human life. A Niebleheim hell, and a triumphant work of labour and determination.

Everyone who visited Manchester both admired it and felt appalled. Charles Dickens used it as the basis for his novel HARD TIMES – the best of times and the worst of times were here – everything the machine could achieve, and the terrible human cost.

Frederick Engels, the son of a German industrialist came here to manage his father’s business interests, and he invited his friend Karl Marx to see what happens when, as he put it, ‘people are regarded only as useful objects.’

Marx, writing the Communist Manifesto, was not against the creation of wealth if wealth would end poverty, but he wanted to see an equal society. His early vision of Socialism was that it should distribute wealth to provide for man’s animal needs, so that man could have the time and the leisure to attend to his human needs.

It is an interesting distinction – and close to Jesus’ strange words that ‘The Kingdom of Heaven is within you.’ It seems that meaning comes from the inside, not from the outside, and human beings are meaning-seeking creatures. Marx and Christ agree that there is more to life than money.

Unfortunately late Capitalism – the Thatcher/Regan revolution, did not believe that there is more to life than money. There was plenty of lip-service about morals and family values and folksy feel-good sentimental hogwash about marriage and stable societies being the blah-de-blah bedrock. But money was all that money had to offer… Got a car?

Get two. Got a house? Get a bigger one. Holidays? Borrow the cash. Credit cards? How many do you want?

The last thirty years – 1979-2009 – have been about grotesquely multiplying our animal needs and making it pretty impossible to attend to our human needs. Education is hopeless, the arts are called luxury items, time off is for wimps, and love is part of the upgrade culture. Keep me for two years and get a newer model.

Everything in our ethos and our society has been towards consumption – all the stones we’ve eaten that we were told were bread have made us ill and fat and stupid and discontented and finally depressed to death. The World Health Organisation says that by 2020, depression will be the second largest cause of death in the western world – right behind heart disease.

But depressed or not, dead or not, we were still singing along to More is More when the band got up and left. The money ran out. Well, it didn’t run out, it just disappeared overnight like the faery gold it was – you know the kind – you promise everything to the imp, go home with the bag of coins, and when you open it it’s full of rocks…

So now, our animal needs won’t be met in triplicate – they won’t be met at all. You won’t be able to own your house. You can’t afford decent food. You will work until you are 70 in a job that offers nothing. You won’t have a pension and your kids will be paying back student loans until they are 40.

We can blame the banks. We can feel like victims. But we bought into this. Money has been our only currency and our core value, which is insane, as it doesn’t really exist. You exist – the person I love. My body exists – my one true home. The planet exists – beautiful, blue, long-suffering, fragile, and irreplaceable. Friendship exists, and our kids, and books and pictures and music, and the feeling we get, when just for a second, life in all its unlived possibility stands in front of us.

Stones are not bread. There is no shortcut to a life that is nourishing and satisfying. It can’t be bought… why do we not know that? Jesus’ reply to Satan was Man Shall Not Live by Bread Alone – and we do know, without explanation, what that means.

I think that Jesus’ reply has two meanings in it: That the whole world is not there to be rendered into a product for my benefit – and even then, even if I were to eat up the whole world, it would not satisfy me.

Our modern version – where stones are not even made into bread – just packaged as bread – would delight Satan. Don’t even bother with the alchemy – just get the wrapper right.

Transfats for the body. Transfats for the soul,…

The next thing that Satan does is to tempt Christ to throw himself off the top of the pinnacle; as the son of god, angels will bear him up, rather than see him dashed to pieces.

‘They shall bear thee up least at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.’

But Jesus is no Jewish princess. He knows that this new scenario is a swift move sideways on the part of Satan. First he appealed to Jesus’ ordinary human appetites – you are very hungry – get yourself something to eat. Now he treats him as a God – or so it seems – but really he is appealing to Jesus’ vanity. Forget your ordinary human limits – they don’t apply to you.

Tony Blair anyone?

When money becomes the core value – when as Engels put it, people regard each other only as useful objects – then celebrity culture offers a seductive way to redefine yourself.

As a celebrity, you become or seem to become, an individual. Everyone knows your name. The rules don’t apply.

Jeanette at Manchester Cathedral
When celebrities say – as they always do – ‘it’s not about the money’, they mean it.
And we need them to mean it – because money culture is full of self-disgust. We need to keep some places that seem untouched by the buy and sell, even though the whole thing is contaminated.

To talk about ‘my dream’ or ‘my music’ helps us all to feel that there are other values – even though the dream is manufactured and the music makes millions.

The rise of the me-society – and the buzz words of individuality and choice are used cynically by the market, but they can only be used to promote everything from hair-dye to mass tourism because they hit a place in us that knows we are being swamped and obliterated, that knows we hardly exist, that knows how difficult it is in consumer-land to be anything but a clone. So twenty million people a week watch the X factor etc, and dream of being Susan Boyle.

Celebrities, of course, have to crash. We love the sex scandals and the addictions, the burn-outs, the bloats, the anorexia.

Celebrities are always throwing themselves off the roofs of their lives – and finding that they can’t fly after all.

And then there’s the rest of us – because the huge rise in drugs and drink problems and
self-harm especially among young people, is a way of trying not to be a mere mortal.

Getting out of your head is also about refusing the limits of your own body – when you can’t live in peace there – and because every bit of fucking advertising is saying all the time just what Satan says to Jesus – Go on – you can do it – risk it – you’re not like the rest – you’re superman – put on your Calvin Klein’s and kick ass.

Jerome Kierval, Nick Leeson, Bernie Madoff – they thought the rules didn’t apply to them. Not ordinary mortals. Look at me I can fly.

No, says Jesus. I can’t fly. It’s about limits. It’s about respecting the human. And it’s about respecting other human beings too – when you believe you are more god than human – you are in trouble – but so are the rest of us.

Tony Blair anybody?

And then Satan stops being sympathetic – aw shucks you’re hungry – or behaving like Simon Cowell – five seconds of fame and when you hit the ground in pieces no one will even want a bit of you as a souvenir – no, Satan gets serious. He takes Jesus up on the high mountain. He shows him the cities of the world and their glory. He says ‘All these things will I give thee if thou wilt fall down and worship me.’

This is playing with the big boys. But the language gives the game away.What looks like absolute power – the kingdom of the world – begins with absolute submission.

Worship me.

But Jesus can’t be bought off. He’s got soul. He says he’s serving god. And Satan departs from him.

We need leaders who can’t be bought off. It’s easy to point the figure at the ones who just fall for the money – the short cuts to riches, the stones into bread brigade, like Mugabe or Marcos.

More dangerous and less obvious are the ones who take up the caped crusader hero myth – like Blair and Bush – who think they can fly round the world fixing it – or who will go to war because it is RIGHT to do so. And then there are the ones who can wreck everything – like Hitler or Stalin… Power. The Kingdom of the World.

It’s corruption in every case – and the word is the clue. It comes from the French word ROMPRE. To break.

The French have 3 verbs for ‘to break’. ‘Casser’: the chair. ‘Briser’: your leg, and Rompre – which is used in the sacrament, the breaking of the bread, and is used for breaking faith, breaking a bond, breaking with someone you loved or trusted.

Corruption is the breaking of faith. The breaking of a bond. That is why it is so serious – because it comes from the inner place not the outer place.

As Auden put it in his poem In Sickness and in Health. Some goods are smashed that cannot be replaced.

That is hard for a throw-away upgrade culture to understand. But we don’t have throwaway souls. And I still think soul is a good word, a lovely word, for something that doesn’t exist empirically, scientifically, quantifiably, but we know what it means to lose it…. You know what I mean when I say, ‘What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his own soul?’

The only way to be more than a number, more than a useful object, more than a consumer, more than a CV or a facebook profile, is to identify what is valuable to you, what is worthwhile to you, worth living worth for – perhaps even worth dying for, and then to keep faith with the you that you are. I don’t mean in a rigid paranoid way; the self changes but the self isn’t for sale.

In this story, Satan has to keep switching tactics – rather like a Cold War soviet spy – if the boobs don’t work, try the binbag full of cash. But Jesus knows who he is. It isn’t goods or fame or power that motivate Jesus. Yet it is called the ‘Temptation of Christ’, so we have to assume that there was a struggle going on. This was a serious encounter.

After this encounter, Jesus begins his ministry. He goes and preaches the Sermon on the Mount – a really radical text that none of us can live up to – especially those right-wing Christians who are always talking about going back to the Bible.

Matthew 5: 43/44 – part of the Sermon on the Mount - had obviously been ripped out of those Bible-belt Bibles on Burn A Koran day…

It is, of course… Love your enemies. Bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you and persecute you. Sarah Palin anybody?

I have noticed that when right-wing religious folk talk about going back to the Bible they generally mean putting homosexuals and the homeless in gaol, putting women and minorities in their place, and putting white men back in power.

But I tell you now that the religious right have a vision for our society, and if we are not careful they will get their way. It started with Bush and Blair destabilising the world in the name of truth and freedom because God had told them it was so. It will end with Sarah Palin and the Tea Party running America.

I said at the start that I had hoped that the economic crisis would cause us to rethink our values – what is so upsetting is that the progressive secular Left has not done any rethinking worth the name – just a bit of apologising and tinkering – while the really scary Right has gone for an all-out war on all those touchy-feely policies they hated – as though subsidised theatre and the arts and single mums and welfare payments brought us to our knees – not a totally naked and savage free market god. Even Baal the flesh-eating god of the Philistines wasn’t as demanding in his sacrifices as the god of the free market. All of the planet and all of its peoples fed into the money-making machine…

I am not suggesting going vegan and cycling everywhere – though you can if you want to – I am thinking that what we can learn from the encounter between Christ and Satan is the importance of knowing what is valuable and standing up for what is valuable. Our human needs matter.We need time, rest, creativity, community, relationship. We need stretches of life that can’t be measured by GDP or economic output. We need to ask if weapons are more important than education. We need to ask what kind of people we want to be and what kind of a life is worthwhile. We need to say that life has an inside as well as an outside – and if organised religion has failed to protect us there – and it has – we will have to find new ways of talking about the invisible, the unknowable, and our obligations to what cannot be counted, but is intensely real.

Jesus let’s Satan have his say – but Jesus knows the difference between the trickster world of stones for bread, the fantasies of superhero status, the glittering disappointments of money and power and what Gurdjieff later called views from the real world.

We are more than money.We are meaning.

Don’t apologise for your soul.

The Manchester Sermon was co-commissioned by Manchester Literature Festival and Manchester Cathedral, and was delivered
by Jeanette Winterson at Manchester Cathedral on 21st October 2010
as part of Manchester Literature Festival.

Manchester Literature Festival
Beehive Mill, Jersey Street
Manchester M4 6JG
www.manchesterliteraturefestival.co.uk

Copyright © Jeanette Winterson

Manchester Literature Festival would like to thank
Arts Council England for their generous support of this project.

One final paragraph of advice: Edward Albee




One final paragraph of advice: Do not burn yourself out. Be as I am – a reluctant enthusiast, a part time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you can. While it is still there. So get out there and mess around with your friends, ramble out yonder and explore the forests, encounter the grizz, climb the mountains. Run the rivers, breathe deep of that yet sweet and lucid air, sit quietly for a while and contemplate the precious stillness, that lovely, mysterious and awesome space. Enjoy yourselves, keep your brain in your head and your head firmly attached to your body, the body active and alive, and I promise you this much: I promise you this one sweet victory over our enemies, over those deskbound people with their hearts in a safe deposit box and their eyes hypnotized by desk calculators. I promise you this: you will outlive the bastards.


Edward Abbey